


Tapping into your heart.

by icepeach



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: ChanSoo - Freeform, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Jealous Chanyeol, M/M, Pining, slight chinguline, tap dancer soo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 04:55:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17318483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icepeach/pseuds/icepeach
Summary: Kyungsoo was into tap dancing. Chanyeol was very much into supporting Kyungsoo in everything he did. It wasn't like he was whipped, not at all, but his friends Baekhyun and Jongdae said otherwise.





	Tapping into your heart.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi. I had this idea for over a year now all because of that one chansoo gif in which ksoo was teaching yeol to tap dance on the countdown photoshoot. But I never had the courage to write it because english isn't my native language, therefore my grammar isn't good and I was very insecure about that. Plus I never wrote a fic before. Anyways it's a new year and I'm trying to be bold so you to chose to read this I really hope you enjoy :)

^_^

It's been a long day of Kyungsoo's uncertainty pacing around and doing everything he could to keep his hands and mind occupied. Chanyeol didn't know what to do to help him but he tried by making him sit and watch a movie with their friends, Baekhyun and Jongdae. He doesn’t even remember that last time he saw his friends being this anxious. He could see the other tapping his feet on the floor like he was impatient so obviously the movie wasn’t helping. But there wasn’t much he could do besides that, all he could do was wait for the answer that Kyungsoo craved for 2 weeks.

After some time Kyungsoo's phone beeped with a message and he immediately got up to check the message on his own. Kyungsoo looked at his phone for what seemed like a long, long minute. Chanyeol tried to read the other’s expression but Kyungsoo’s face was neutral, not really giving anything away.

 

"So?" Baekhyun and Jongdae stopped the movie and asked at the same time, looking at him while they were sitting on the couch. Chanyeol, on the other hand, was too nervous to sit down. He tried to peek behind his friend's shoulder, unable to read anything.

"Did you get it?" He asked, anticipating.

 

Kyungsoo locked his phone, putting it in his pocket. He glanced at his friends, hesitating. Chanyeol knew this was very important to Kyungsoo, that's why he was so nervous. This was his big break, his first lead in a play. The first chance of him getting the attention of the general public and directors. Chanyeol knew no matter the answer, he was ready to support him, that’s what he always did. And just like that ... Kyungsoo's eyes began to glow and a shy smile slowly started to appear on his face.

 

"I got the part," he announced.

“You did?”  Jongdae and Baekhyun asked in unison standing up to hug their friend. Kyungsoo nodded, still smiling. “I knew you could do it!” Chanyeol added taking the opportunity to give him a personal hug, his long body covering the small body of the other. Kyungsoo pinched him in his tummy to get away, laughing at his friend's exaggerated display of affection.

“I need to start my research right away, can you help me?” He asked only looking at Chanyeol “I need to find tap dance videos so I can watch it later.”

“Sure!”  Chanyeol replied immediately without hesitation making the other smile.

“Thanks Yeol... I'll just take a shower and then we can start ok?”

 

Chanyeol nodded while Kyungsoo headed down the hall toward his bedroom. Chanyeol followed him with his eyes and then he looked at his other friends, sitting in the living room on the sofa watching the entire thing.

“Man ... you're so whipped!” Jongdae said, grabbing the popcorn and filling his mouth with it.

“Stop saying that like I don't do the same things for you, idiot!” He answered sitting beside his friends on the couch.

“It's true,” Baekhyun continued “but you always go above and beyond when it comes to Kyungsoo and you know it.”

“Isn't that what best friends supposed to do?” He retorted but Baekhyun simply rolled his eyes and pressed play on the movie they were watching before Kyungsoo got the news, not bothered by answering him.

 

That was really what they did. From the moment the smaller asked him directions to his next class on college and Chanyeol found out they were heading to the same class. Despite their different personalities, Chanyeol being more outgoing, they immediately hit it off. They matched well. And from then on, Chanyeol and Kyungsoo supported each other in absolutely everything, even the most embarrassing things. Kyungsoo was there when Chanyeol lost a bet and had to walk the entire campus dressed as a fox from a cartoon movie he liked. He was there to help Chanyeol write his songs, giving him tips. He was there when Chanyeol got his first show opening for a local band. Just like Chanyeol was there for him, whether it was to support him with his small acting gigs on college or to support him in whatever passion he had at the time, like cooking for example. Chanyeol extended his support even to Kyungsoo’s bad decisions in life, like relationships. Not that Kyungsoo had dated a lot, from what Chanyeol can remember he only had 2 relationships that ended up badly. But even when Chanyeol was annoyed about the guys that, in his point of view, clearly weren't good enough for Kyungsoo. He made sure to support his friend, because he was happy and that was all that mattered to him.

But being truthful, Chanyeol has always been a little whipped for Kyungsoo. Always finding reasons to make the smaller laugh, always making sure to show interest in the things he was passionate about, anyone with eyes outside of their little bubble could see the giant had a crush on Kyungsoo. Chanyeol knew the way he felt about the other was more than friendly, but he wasn't sure to how extent his crush was just a crush or deeper feelings. Because of that he wasn't ready to jeopardize their friendship. Maybe he would never be. Even if he the possibility of him confessing his feelings and the other replying positively passed through his mind, he has seen what a relationship between two friends can cause.

Back in high school he had a really nice group of friends and two of them started dating, everything was great until the point the couple started fighting, they even fought when the group was together leaving them in an awkward environment. Sometimes one of them would come up to Chanyeol and tell their side of the story, then the other did the same and Chanyeol was caught in between. Moral of the story the group fell apart when they broke up. Now that Chanyeol has a really nice group of friends formed throughout college. He wasn't going to put the friendship their created through the same thing. It was just a little crush, he's been managing that for a while, so it's nothing, he thinks.

He was trying at least, but he couldn’t help but look so affectionately at Kyungsoo while he was lying down on his front as he stared at the laptop screen without looking anywhere else, Chanyeol loved how his friend's dark eyes glowed when he was invested in something. And now it seemed like he would really be invested in tap dancing. Kyungsoo felt his eyes on him, so he paused the video to look at Chanyeol with a questioning look.

“What?” He asked.

Chanyeol smiled embarrassed as he turned his gaze back to the laptop.

“You're really excited about this.” 

Kyungsoo sat cross-legged, his shoulder close to Chanyeol's arm.

“I am ... I want to do this right.” Kyungsoo bit his lower lip nervous, like he wasn't sure if he could do that.

“You will” Chanyeol said looking directly into Kyungsoo's eyes “You always do, Soo.”

Kyungsoo smiled fondly, not saying anything, just looking back at Chanyeol. There was no need for words; Chanyeol could see through the way the other looked at him that he was thankful for Chanyeol for always believing in him, for always encouraging him whenever he was scared. The silence went on for a minute with Kyungsoo’s eyes on him until Chanyeol felt nervous about it, he couldn’t stand still for too much time with his friends’ eyes on him. Every time he did that his stomach started to flip. So he stood up, ignoring it as always.

 

“Obviously if you need any help, I'm right here ...” He said pointing to himself. “I'm a great dancer you know…”

Chanyeol tapped his feet, not really following a pattern, making Kyungsoo smile.

“That's great, Chanyeol.” He said standing up “You can already take my part.”

“Too bad they settled for a tiny dancer.” He replied with sarcasm, making Kyungsoo pull his ear to his height and making the giant whine because of it.

^_^

 

Chanyeol knocked on the door of Kyungsoo’s bedroom, putting his head inside. Kyungsoo's room was always neat, he was meticulous to the point everything should be in place and the color combinations always had to be in harmony, that being a mixture of black, white and gray. But every time he wanted to find some clothes he would throw everything on the bed and that was the only part in which Chanyeol could say Kyungsoo was a bit messy.

"Hey, are you going to wear that black shirt?"

Kyungsoo was standing in front of the wardrobe, looking through his clothes and throwing them on the bed. He rolled his eyes, already knowing what the giant wanted, he tossed a shirt at Chanyeol's direction and he caught it immediately.

"Thanks" He smiled.

This is a normal thing in their friendship. Once they went to live together, it didn't take long for Chanyeol to take possession of Kyungsoo's belongings. He loved how the boy's shirts fit tightly on his body. And this habit also reached Kyungsoo, who sometimes at home, wore the very large shirts from the tall boy. Jongdae always teased Chanyeol about it, how boyfriend this thing with them was, but he always denied. Pointing out that Jongdae also borrowed things from Baekhyun when he needed and they weren’t in a relationship.

After a very busy week, they finally settled down for a Friday night to celebrate Kyungsoo's role in the play. Jongdae and Baekhyun were already waiting for them at the karaoke bar as Kyungsoo and Chanyeol arrived there late. The place was crowded, as expected, young people enjoying the evening at their tables and waiters pacing from side to side. Chanyeol located his friends at a table near the karaoke, as expected Baekhyun already taking care of the microphone.

"Hey!" Jongdae waved at them from the table. Chanyeol waved back and went toward his friends, followed by Kyungsoo.

When they reached the table, Chanyeol noticed a guy sitting next to Jongdae. He swayed his arms laughing as the music Baekhyun sang filled the place. The guy seemed to have come straight out of a fashion magazine, with tight jeans and a slightly open dress shirt. "Damn, he's he cute," Chanyeol thought. But that thought changed quickly as soon as the guy noticed them approaching and looked directly at Kyungsoo, smiling. "Not cute," Chanyeol said in his mind, looking back at Kyungsoo who had not noticed the look on the new guy’s face.

"Dude, why are you so always late?" Jongdae asked as they sat down at the table. The guy looked from Kyungsoo to Chanyeol with a friendly smile.

"You know Chanyeol can't leave the house without his hair being neat," Kyungsoo said mockingly.

"It wasn’t me who took forever in front of the wardrobe trying to pick an outfit." Chanyeol scoffed back, earning a pull in his ear from Kyungsoo. He hissed.

"Hey people!" Baekhyun said as he finished his song and came to join his friends at the table.

"Have you been taking care of that mic all night, Baek?" Chanyeol asked.

The blond shrugged, putting bottles of soju on the table.

"I figured I should bless people with my voice tonight..." he looked at the new guy noticing how out of place he looked. “Oh ... yeah, guys this is Jongin" he said pointing at the new guy and then to his friends "and these are Chanyeol and Kyungsoo".

"Hi," all three said at the same time.

Baekhyun looked at the small interaction and smiled at Kyungsoo.

"Soo, he's graduating in dance. I thought you guys would have something in common to talk about."

"Oh ..." Kyungsoo looked surprised from Baekhyun to Jongin "Why is that?"

"Baekhyun told me you're practicing tap dancing," Jongin said looking at Kyungsoo and confessed "I happen to know a lot about tap dancing."

"That's cool." Kyungsoo smiled back at Jongin.

Chanyeol saw the interaction and decided it was time to start the celebration. He opened a bottle of soju and poured shots into the glasses.

"So let's start this ..." he began and he raised his glass up "He finally got the lead role he so much dreamed of. We're so proud of you, Soo. This is for you!"

Kyungsoo's eyes gleamed, he looked so happy. He smiled fondly at his friend and took his shot.

Much of the night Baekhyun and Jongdae filled the space with their voices. They had exceptional voices, but as the night passed they began to babble more than anything. It was funny. Jongdae whining with the microphone on his hand, leaning his arm on Baekhyun trying to share the microphone with him. Then, Kyungsoo joined them, but he took it seriously by choosing an r&b song and singing with his eyes closed. Chanyeol always said Kyungsoo's vocal colour was one of his favorites in the world. It was smooth like velvet and he always felt like melting every time he listened to it.

When the song ended, Kyungsoo smiled embarrassed by the claps of his friends. He bowed down and came to his seat grabbing another bottle of soju.

"So Jongin ... how did you meet Baek?" Kyungsoo asked, looking at the new guy curiously. Jongin looked back, surprised that the man was talking to him.

"Oh… a friend of a friend" He explained "My friend, Sehun, introduced me to him when they ran into each other. Then we went to grab coffee and ended up talking."

Chanyeol was looking at the two people who took their turn at the karaoke, but in reality he was actually listening to the conversation on his side.

"I told him about your role," Baekhyun said. "I thought he could help you, Soo."

Chanyeol tried, he really tried to ignore, but it was stronger than he.

"Don't you already have a mentor for this?" He asked looking directly at his best friend.

Baekhyun looked back at Chanyeol, his eyes scanning the giant.

"I have yes ..." Kyungsoo bit his lip looking at his feet, as if considering then looked back at Jongin smiling slightly "but any help is welcome."

At that, Jongin smiled brightly nodding with his head. Chanyeol felt as if he wanted to take Kyungsoo away at that very moment. He knew he was being jealous, he also knew he had no reason to feel that way. If he acted on it, he'd just mess up the night and he didn't want to upset Kyungsoo. Taking the last drink from the bottle, he stood up and excused himself to the bathroom. Minutes later he stopped at the bar to grab more soju's bottles and headed towards the table. Kyungsoo was smiling, no ... not smiling, laughing ... loudly. He was laughing so hard he had a hand on his stomach, as if it hurt laughing so much.

"What's so funny?" Chanyeol asked, putting the bottles on the table and sitting down.

"He ..." Kyungsoo began, but stopped, trying to calm his breathing. "He thought you were my boyfriend."

Now, even though Jongdae and Baekhyun always teased them about it, that was the first time he saw someone saying that to them outside of their circle of friends. But Chanyeol didn't understand what’s so funny about that. Chanyeol looked at Jongin, who quickly looked away, coyly. Then he looked at Kyungsoo, the boy was still laughing.

"What's so funny about that?" He blurted out.

Kyungsoo stopped smiling, frowning.

"Of course it's funny ... It's us, Yeol" Kyungsoo replied like the idea of them being together was absurd. _Ouch… that hurt_ , Chanyeol thought. Of course there wasn’t a reason for him to feel that way when he, himself, felt like the idea of them being together was out of the question. But when his friend said that out loud, it felt different. It felt real, like really there's no chance for them.

Kyungsoo looked at Chanyeol trying to decipher him. Chanyeol smirked taking a sip from his bottle.

"Yeah ..." he put on his best smile, looking at Jongin. "We're best friends actually" trying not to sound cold.

The rest of the night followed, the boys taking turns at the karaoke. But Chanyeol's mood dropped drastically. He was the best when it came to not show his real feelings so he smiled, talked unimportant things, and drank ... a lot. Some part of the night he took his turn at the karaoke and he sang with his back to his friends' table. He didn't want to see Kyungsoo and Jongin engaging in a conversation, which seemed very flirtatious. Soon enough the night was over and he didn't even notice.

Although living together, Baekhyun and Jongdae decided to take Jongin home and Kyungsoo took on the charge of taking a very large, very tall, slightly drunk Chanyeol home.

Lucky enough, their apartment was only a few blocks away from the bar and even though Chanyeol was slightly drunk he could still walk on his own and Kyungsoo didn’t have to carry him all the way. They walked home slowly, silent, just feeling the night breeze reach their faces. When they reached their door Chanyeol leaned against the wall waiting while Kyungsoo put his hand in his pocket to get the key. He put his hand in his pocket, frowning, and then he touched his other pocket. Kyungsoo rolled his eyes, sighing.

 

"I think I left my keys in the bar," the boy said, still trying to find them in his pockets.

"What?" Chanyeol asked, surprised. Kyungsoo was never to forget things in places. He should be very distracted for something like that happen. He felt his jaw tightening, thinking of the handsome with a lightly brown skin tone that could very much be the reason for that.

Almost immediately, Kyungsoo's phone beeped with a notification. Chanyeol waited while the younger read and typed something back.

"What?" Chanyeol asked again.

"Baekhyun has it," he replied, putting his phone back in his pocket. "I think I forgot there and he picked it up." Massaging his temples, Kyungsoo sighed once more, "Do you have your keys with you?"

That's the thing, Chanyeol was so used to Kyungsoo having his things in their respective places he didn't bother taking his keys with him. He bit his lip, scratching the back of his neck.

"Hm ... I left it at home."

The younger looked at him as if he couldn't believe it, even though he could ... very much ... believe in it. It was Chanyeol after all.

"Sorry?" the tall boy said, almost like a question. He prepared for his friend to pull his ear or do something to scold him, but he simply rolled his eyes and sat with his back against the door. Chanyeol followed him, sitting beside him, inches apart.

 

As they sat there waiting for their friends to come with the key, Chanyeol was lost in thought. Usually he would take advantage of a moment like this to fill the space with his loud voice and annoy Kyungsoo, but he was just reliving the night on his head. The way Jongin looked with interest at Kyungsoo, the way Kyungsoo denied that they were boyfriends, the way Chanyeol turned to the table when he finished singing at the karaoke and saw the two of them sitting closer, the way Kyungsoo smiled and seemed totally invested in the conversation, the way Chanyeol's chest tightened at the sight of it. He should have been used to it, he's seen his friend with other guys, yet, it didn't hurt any less.

 

"You're awfully quiet," Kyungsoo murmured, taking Chanyeol out of his thoughts.

He glanced sideways at his friend, noticing how serious the younger looked at him, his lips pressed to a firm line. He looked away.

"It must be the alcohol ..." The tall boy said, sliding down so that his head dropped into the crook of Kyungsoo's shoulder. "It's making me sleepy." Once again, very good at pretending something wasn't bothering him.

They stayed like this for a while, Kyungsoo feeling the breath of Chanyeol on his shoulder. After some time Kyungsoo began to bite the nail on his thumb, a very bad habit he had never learned to detach. When Chanyeol noticed he immediately took his friend's hand, barring him from reaching to his mouth.

"Sorry for leaving the keys at home," he said, knowing Kyungsoo always did this when he was nervous. The older must have upset his friend about the keys, Chanyeol thought.

"It's fine, Yeol," the other replied back, trying to take his hand back. He didn't let him, Chanyeol knew he was going to bite his nail again so he simply grabbed his friend's hand and rested it on his thigh still interlaced with his own hand.

Kyungsoo glanced at them, biting his lower lip, and then looked away before Chanyeol noticed. Chanyeol wasn't always this touchy, only when he was feeling tipsy did he allow himself to be so bold.

 

"Is it weird that I missed you today at the party even though you were right there?" Kyungsoo asked, "I feel like we've barely talked."

_Yes, it's weird Kyungsoo. We live together after all_. Chanyeol thought about saying that to tease him, but he knew what he meant. They always spent time talking at the parties and today Chanyeol was kind of distant. He lifted his head from his shoulder, looking straight at him. He missed him too and he knew exactly why they didn’t get to talk much. He knew it was not the time to sound jealous, yet he didn’t hold himself.

"You were too busy with Mr. Dancer"

 "He looked out of place, Yeol." Kyungsoo sighed, "I just wanted to make small talk."

They sat there in silence. Chanyeol didn't really feel like replying, with the way he was feeling because of the alcohol and with how the night went on, he wasn't sure he could hold his bitterness so he chose to stay quiet, lost in his mind.

"I think he'll help me with the dance," Kyungsoo revealed, minutes after.

"I thought I was already helping you," he smirked, not really looking at Kyungsoo's eyes. The latter smiled, using his free hand to punch him in the shoulder.

"Even if you're a great, perfect dancer ..." Kyungsoo ironic uttered "I still need a pro."

"Aren't you going to have a mentor, though?" He said trying not to sound annoyed. "Do you really need him?"

He was already being too transparent.

"Chanyeol ..." the boy whispered.

"There you are!" Baekhyun shouted, announcing his arrival with Jongdae, surprising the boys who immediately untied their hands getting up.

 

^_^

 

The next few days were very strange. Kyungsoo started his tap dance training and Chanyeol barely saw him at home. Chanyeol himself was very busy with work, but even so he was used to get home and find his friend on the kitchen laughing out loud with Baekhyun. That had not happened much lately.

Today, though, things were different. Chanyeol came home after a long writing session and heard laughter coming from the kitchen. _Kyungsoo must be home_ , he thought, smiling to himself and heading toward the kitchen.

When he arrived in the kitchen, he was surprised to find something he didn't expect, more precisely someone he didn't expect. Kyungsoo and Jongin sat at the coffee table, laughing like best friends, as if they had known each other for years. Chanyeol opened his mouth in shock.

"Hey Yeol!" Kyungsoo said noticing his friend's presence.

Chanyeol glanced from him to Jongin trying his best to fix his surprise with a friendly smile.

"Hi! Hey Jongin ... what's up?"

The boy smiled, greeting Chanyeol. He looked a little shy, now that Chanyeol could notice, as if the giant's presence intimidated him. He looked comfortable just minutes ago though, when he and Kyungsoo were alone.

"We just left the practice, Jongin brought me home so I offered him coffee," Kyungsoo explained, perhaps noticing the confusion on Chanyeol’s face. "Do you want some? I can do it for you."

Chanyeol fixed the strap of his bag on his shoulder, clearing his throat.

"Hm ... actually I'm kind of tired." He looked back from his friend to Jongin. "I'm going to take a shower and go to bed."

Kyungsoo looked at him confused, his big round eyes, trying to read him. Funny, Chanyeol thought, he'd been grumpy the whole week for barely seeing his friend, and now he was deliberately declining a chance to spend time with him. He couldn't help it, however, he really had a long day and he was tired. Chanyeol just wanted to wash that day away and rest.

He waved goodbye to the boys and headed toward his room but Kyungsoo stopped him in the middle of the hall, holding his arm for a second.

"Hey, it's everything okay?" He asked, looking a little worried. He hated that face, he hated worrying his friend for nothing. Chanyeol put a hand on his shoulder, lightly squeezing it to reaffirm that he was fine.

"I'm fine, don't worry. I had a long day... that's all." He could see that Kyungsoo still didn't seem convinced, so he tried to deflect the subject. "I haven't seen you much, are you practicing a lot?" He asked.

The smaller immediately smiled.

"Yeah," he said excitedly. "I've been training non-stop, Yeol. My body hurts everywhere, but it's worth it." Chanyeol chuckled; Kyungsoo was always so excited when he started to like something. It was funny. "Jongin is helping me so much. He's so good, Yeol, you have to see him dancing."

"That's nice," Chanyeol replied, feeling that familiar knot in his throat. He glanced toward the kitchen remembering the boy was probably waiting for Kyungsoo. "Hm, you'd better not let him wait. Let's talk later, okay?"

Kyungsoo followed Chanyeol's gaze to the kitchen.

"Oh right," he murmured, as if he had just remembered this detail. "Ok, hm ... good night, Yeol"

Waving Kyungsoo goodbye, he went to his room dropping the bag on the floor and throwing himself on the bed covering his eyes with the pillow, the image of Kyungsoo and Jongin laughing together insisting on appearing in his head. Somehow his mind went back to the time he started to realize he felt something for Kyungsoo. It was a year ago. They had just decided to move in together along with Jongdae and Baekhyun. It was easier for all of them, the place was big and they could split the rent without worrying about money for their personals bills. They were in a nightclub celebrating a friend's birthday party from college. The music played loudly on the sound system and the place was packed. Kyungsoo had gone to get a drink at the bar when a guy approached him and started to hit on him in a very advanced way. Chanyeol was on the dance floor with Jongdae and Baekhyun dancing; he looked sideways toward the bar and saw the whole scene. Now he knew full well that Kyungsoo could take care of himself, but for some reason he felt a strong sense of protection over the other and without even thinking he headed toward the bar to stop whatever was happening.

Chanyeol was never a person that gets involved in a fight, even if his height and strength gave him an advantage, he never found himself in a situation that had to resort to it. He approached asking what was happening and Kyungsoo told him not to worry. Chanyeol looked from his friend to the guy who was now observing Chanyeol that had stopped beside Kyungsoo. It was as if the guy didn't care, he kept looking at Kyungsoo with a hard gaze and moving on to him, so Chanyeol told him to back off and the other asked if Chanyeol was Kyungsoo's boyfriend, in which he denied.

"So that's none of your business," the guy replied, trying to sidestep Chanyeol, who was now between him and Kyungsoo.

Maybe it was the alcohol or the annoying way this guy didn't seem to give up, but Chanyeol found himself getting very angry and shoving the guy away who responded by punching him in the side of the face.

And that's how he ended up the night being dragged around the apartment by his friend after being thrown out of the nightclub by the securities, Kyungsoo was holding his wrist while walking until he found the first aid kit and took him to the bathroom to take care of his eyebrow cut.

Chanyeol put down the toilet lid and sat on it while Kyungsoo picked up the things he needed, the younger standing between Chanyeol's legs lifting his face so he could check the cut. Chanyeol could very well see by the serious way that the other was cleaning his cut that he was angry and it was because of him.

"I'm sorry," he tried to appease the other.

"You're such an idiot! Why did you have to barge in?"

"That guy was being a jerk to you, I couldn't help it," he replied, looking up while the other put an ointment on the cut making Chanyeol hiss.

Kyungsoo stopped, turning his back on Chanyeol to look for something in the kit.

"Please Yeol! It's not like these jerks are a rare thing in nightclubs and I didn't have to deal with them constantly. You never fought and you had no reason to fight now."

Chanyeol knew that, he knew it very well. But that didn't stop him and not even he could understand his feelings when he saw that guy move on to Kyungsoo that way. Chanyeol could see from the tone the other was using that he was very upset and that this wasn't a joke to him. He suddenly felt very bad for ruining the night that way. Kyungsoo turned and grabbed Chanyeol's face to finish the bandage; he looked at his friend, his eyebrows frowning in a tight line.

"I don't want you to get hurt, especially because of me," Kyungsoo added, almost like a sigh, tired.

And that was the first moment that Chanyeol felt his heart beating in a different way, feeling a chill inside his belly and an overwhelming wave of affection for the other. He held Kyungsoo's hand when he finished putting the band aid on and said, trying to sound as sincere as possible "I'm sorry, Soo."

Chanyeol realized just then how close they were to each other, with him sitting in the toilet and Kyungsoo between his legs. Somehow he holding his hand made the moment different from when his friend was taking care of his cut. The tension was there in the silence shared by them while they were staring at each other. And Chanyeol was scared, his heart beating loudly through his chest, the urge to kiss the other which he never felt before. Chanyeol was sure that Kyungsoo was realizing the same thing from the way he was holding his breath.

It was only seconds, until they heard the door opening and the sound of Jongdae and Baekhyun coming in, Kyungsoo blinked twice before letting go of Chanyeol's hand looking embarrassed. He cleared his throat and focused on arranging the first aid kit,

"It’s okay, Yeol. Just don't do it again."

And just like that the moment was gone, like it had never happened, to Kyungsoo at least, but Chanyeol couldn't take those few seconds off his head. The next few days were normal, but sometimes he caught himself staring at Kyungsoo more than before, and every time the other so much as touched him, his heart began racing and Chanyeol wanted it to stop. He was losing his mind really. He couldn't have a crush on his best friend, that couldn't be possible. But soon Kyungsoo started to go on dates and that familiar knot he felt when the guy tried to hit on him came back and that's when he accepted he really had a crush on him.

 

^_^

 

Chanyeol loved to sing, he really loved. But during his last years at university, he gradually became more passionate about composing. Lyrics with meanings, lyrics that told a story, funny lyrics, lyrics that people could hear and think "I can relate to that". He loved to create all of these. He was not a famous songwriter, none of it, but he was working to get there. And that's how he got a spot at the company that he works, LSMusic, starting with an internship until he joined the team of songwriters. Chanyeol was still a beginner, it could be said, most of his songs were discarded, but one time or another he could be chosen for an alternative track by some of the company's artists and he was very satisfied with that.

Although he couldn't say that now. Chanyeol was sitting on the studio couch crushing what appeared to be the thousandth paper and tossing it into the wastebasket as he sighed in frustration.

"Writer's block?" A female voice said. Chanyeol glanced over and saw Wendy entering the room. She put her bag on the table, taking out a small notebook, her composition notebook Chanyeol assumed.

"Apparently I can't write to save a life." Chanyeol confessed, looking at his own notebook with blank papers. He hoped the words could magically appear on it. He noticed the girl writing something in her notebook, curious Chanyeol asked what she was writing.

"A song," she explained. "The music I want to use for the audition."

Wendy's dream was different, she wanted to sing, wanted to be an artist. She entered the company because of her compositions, but she wanted to try the audition.

"Do you need any help?" Chanyeol asked ironically, knowing he couldn't even help himself at the moment. Wendy rolled her eyes, laughing at her colleague.

"Why can't you write?" She asked.

"A lot on my mind," he replied with a shrug. "My thoughts are kind of a mess and I can't get them on paper."

At this Wendy stopped writing and looked at Chanyeol with interest, "Did anything happen?"

Chanyeol was always so used to keeping everything to himself, that the idea of talking with someone about it seemed alien. Baekhyun and Jongdae were his closest friends besides Kyungsoo, but he never felt comfortable talking about his feelings because they usually involved Kyungsoo and Kyungsoo was also their friend. He looked at Wendy considering, but didn't say anything at the end. Only saying it was just a few things, nothing to worry about.

After a few hours of more crumpled papers and frustrated attempts to write, Chanyeol and Wendy decided to grab a cup of coffee in the coffee shop near the studio. They were leaving the building when Chanyeol spotted Kyungsoo in black gym clothes from head to toe, with Jongin at his side. Kyungsoo caught sight of his friend at the same time as him, waving at him. Chanyeol stopped on his way with Wendy at his side, waiting for Kyungsoo to cross the street and approach where they stopped. When they did, Kyungsoo looked curiously from Chanyeol to Wendy before greeting them.

"Hi" Chanyeol replied "Leaving practice?" Chanyeol pointed to the academy bag that Kyungsoo carried, Jongin also carried one.

"Yes, we just finished. We were going to the diner." He explained. "Are you free? Do you want to go with us?" He looked at Chanyeol with hope, which it broke the moment Chanyeol denied. "Wendy and I have some things to do," he added.

"Oh," Kyungsoo said in surprise, looking at Wendy once more. They didn't know each other. Kyungsoo has seen her a few times when he was bringing something for Chanyeol in the studio, but they never actually hold a conversation. "Okay, see you at home then?" he asked, with the same big, hopeful eyes.

Chanyeol nodded and said goodbye heading in the opposite direction with Wendy going his way.

"Do you mind explaining what that was? Why didn't we go with them?" He asked, trying to follow Chanyeol's large steps.

"I don't want to bother their date."

"Wow ... why does that sound so bitter?"

It was exactly what he felt, every time he saw his friend with that man, bitter as a cup of strong coffee without any sugar.

"You like him," she said, as a fact and not a question. Wendy assumed that Chanyeol's silence was a statement so she continued. "Why don't you tell him?"

In that Chanyeol snorted, yeah right. "We're friends; I don't want to ruin it."

This was the biggest piece of information that Chanyeol had ever let out, he supposed that it happened because of Wendy's insistence with the right questions.

 

"And why would that happen?"

Chanyeol remembered his childhood friends, remembered how close they were and how that simply ended the moment they broke up.

"I saw it happen ..." he explained, lost in thought. "I don't want this for us. Especially when I don’t know how deep my feelings for him are."

“But you’re jealous… isn’t that prove enough?” She asked confused.

Chanyeol didn't know how to reply to that. She could be right. But when Chanyeol stopped to think about the possibilities, he always back down. What if he acknowledged his feelings for Kyungsoo were real and he tried to act on it? What if Kyungsoo rejected him? What if he didn't and they started dating but the feelings faded with time? The only certainty Chanyeol had was that if they stayed friends, he would never losing him, they would stay with each other forever. So he shrugged saying "not enough to risk it."

Chanyeol noticed that Wendy stopped half way; she looked at him like she wanted to tell him something, so he asked "what?"

Wendy fidgeted a little bit, trying to come up with the right words.

""He seemed pretty disappointed that you turn him down?" She questioned. "I don't know, isn't he like your best friend or something? Shouldn't you at least explain to him why you’re avoiding him like that?"

 

^_^

 

Later that night, Chanyeol was sitting on the floor of his room with his back resting against the side of the bed. He had a laptop next to him and a notebook while his guitar was resting on his lap. He spent the night trying to create something new, but as it was in the company he was failing miserably at it.

An hour later he gave up and was just killing time while playing random songs on his guitar. The song he was currently playing was one of his favorites, the soft guitar, the lyrics; Chanyeol closed his eyes feeling the music as he sang.

 

_Breathe deep, breathe clear_

_Know that I'm here_

_Know that I'm here_

_Waiting_

_Stay strong, stay gold_

_You don't have to fear_

_You don't have to fear_

_Waiting_

_I see you soon_

_I'll see you soon_

 

He was so immersed in the music that he was playing that he didn't notice Kyungsoo leaning against the door frame looking at him with a fond smile. He didn't stop playing; he simply waved at his friend to sit beside him and continued humming to the song, playing the notes on his guitar.

 

_How could a heart like yours_

_Ever love a heart like mine?_

_How could I live before?_

_How could I have been so blind?_

_You opened up my eyes_

_You opened up my eyes_

The lyrics... Chanyeol could really identify with it now. He kept playing, with his eyes closed, until the song reached the end. There was a bit of silence when it ended, like both of them were still immersed in the song, then he put the guitar aside and finally greeted his friend to break the moment.

"Hey,"

"I really do love your voice," Kyungsoo replied with sincerity in his voice.

Chanyeol never knew how to respond to compliments, especially compliments coming from Kyungsoo. He checked his friend out; it looked like he just came back from practicing.

"Hm thanks ... How was the training?" he asked and with that Kyungsoo kept telling him everything about his day and the tap dance. Chanyeol smiled affectionately as he listened. His friend, who usually was not a person of many words, spoke enthusiastically without stopping. You could see the passion in his eyes and Chanyeol was very happy to hear about it. He loved to see his friend like this.

“Remember when you started to like cooking and you filled the kitchen with all these receipts and your face was all dirty with flour?” Chanyeol asked smiling from the memory. They would get home to a mess and Kyungsoo would make him, Baekhyun and Jongdae try it all. “You looked like a little boy so excited. It was cute. You look like that now too.”

Kyungsoo glanced at him surprised. His ears turning slightly pink. He shoved Chanyeol’s face to look away from him. “Shut up” he said a little embarrassed from the memory.

They both talked so much they didn’t notice the time passing, Chanyeol only realized when Kyungsoo gave a long yawn stretching his arms.

"You should go to sleep ... you must be tired"

Kyungsoo blinked, eyes flickering with fatigue.

"Yeah I'm going ... I still need to shower" He said getting up. Chanyeol did the same, accompanying him to the door.

Kyungsoo paused at the door, looking unsure as he looked at Chanyeol.

"This was nice ... wasn't it? We haven't talked in a while."

What Wendy said came to Chanyeol's mind and he knew he had to do something about it, they were growing apart and Chanyeol didn’t want to lose his friends over his petty feelings.

"How about we do this again? We could hang out in some nice place." He asked, hoping his friend would have a day off.

"Yes ... I want to," Kyungsoo replied.

Chanyeol gave him his puppy smile, nodding and giving him good night before closing the door. He would need to come up with a good idea for how they would spend their time.

 

^_^

 

The night they set to meet Chanyeol took a long time to get ready. He was excited since it had been a while that he and Kyungsoo hang out together. He wanted to enjoy every moment of the night with his friend and he had everything planned. Chanyeol didn't tell the other where they were going, he simply gestured for Kyungsoo to follow him to his scooter.

On the way to his bike, Chanyeol got to notice how handsome Kyungsoo looked. He was wearing beige khaki pants and a black turtleneck sweater. His hair was covering his forehead almost reaching the frame of his glasses. He looked lovely. And he looked curious.

"So, are you going to tell me where we're going now?" he asked, before getting on the bike with Chanyeol. The other smiled maliciously.

"Just get on the scooter."

They stopped on the sidewalk near a theater. Kyungsoo hugged himself because of the breeze of the night, he noticed many people entering the place, but he couldn't tell what the performance of the night was. He looked at Chanyeol once again waiting for him to finally give an explanation, but the boy just rested his hand behind his back and gestured toward the theater. Chanyeol presented the tickets at the entrance and they went in to look for their seats.

The place was packed, as expected. People talking loudly and looking for their proper sits, soon they found theirs, in the third row backwards. Kyungsoo continued with his big, curious eyes steady toward Chanyeol, he looked from him to the stage and Chanyeol could see how eager he was to know. He was about to give him the answer he'd been waiting for when everybody went silent while the lights went off and a spotlight lit the center of the stage.

A sound started to echo but they still couldn't see where it came from. It started slowly and low, almost like a whisper... TAP TAP TAP - pause - TAP TAP TAP - pause. The spotlight lit up a guy on the stage and they could finally see where the sound came from ... from his feet. When Kyungsoo understood what it was he looked at Chanyeol surprised, his mouth slightly opened in an 'o', the other shook his head nodding as if saying without words to his friend _'yes, I know_.'

One day after they set the date for them to hang out, Chanyeol was surfing through the Internet when he found an ad saying that a tap dance performance was scheduled for the weekend, 2 blocks near their apartment, it was almost as if the odds were in their favor, he knew immediately that Kyungsoo would love it.

And Chanyeol was right seeing how his friend's eyes were shining now as the stage began to be filled by several dancers, their feet hitting the floor following a rhythm. The way Kyungsoo was so entranced with the performance made Chanyeol's heart so warm, as cheesy as it sounds. It was as if Kyungsoo wanted to capture every moment presented on the stage, he followed from the feet of the dancers to the movements that they made with their body and Chanyeol saw how the smaller tapped his fingers on his knees, almost as if he wanted to get up and do it with his own feet. He seemed so invested, so connected to the dance that Chanyeol knew it had been the best decision he'd ever taken in a long time. It was all that mattered to him. Not his own feelings, but Kyungsoo's happiness.

At that moment Kyungsoo turned his face looking at Chanyeol, perhaps feeling that the giant couldn't stop observe him. Chanyeol turned his gaze back to the stage, embarrassed that he was caught in the act. But then he felt his hand being wrapped by another and he looked at them, being caught off guard. He slowly lifted his head looking back at Kyungsoo and saw the boy smiling affectionately at him and Chanyeol could see a million things behind that smile and the way he looked at him, but mostly he could see just how grateful Kyungsoo was for the night.

The performance continued, but Kyungsoo didn't release his hand for a moment and this made Chanyeol distracted. Kyungsoo's focus was all on the tap dance, but Chanyeol’s whole focus was on Kyungsoo. Like always.

After the performance they decided to eat something at the diner next to the theater and then they headed to the park to walk. Chanyeol parked the scooter and followed Kyungsoo, feeling the night breeze cool his skin. It wasn't too cold, just enough to chill the back of his neck, but it was okay.

Chanyeol was happy; they didn't have a night like that in a long time. It was so good that they didn't even notice the time passing, as they talked about everything, never running out of subject. Kyungsoo couldn't stop talking about the performance, every detail he had noticed, and even if Chanyeol didn't understand the terms the other was talking about, he nodded, enthusiastic about whatever the younger man said. In return, Kyungsoo heard Chanyeol's problems of writing songs lately and how that was making trouble for him at the company. They shared about their thoughts and problems as they always did since they became friends, but today something seemed different, it was as if they hadn't seen each other in years and they had the need to share everything they had gone through in the last days in a single moment.

They talked for what seemed like hours until they realized it was too cold and too late to stay outdoors, so they left to go to home. Even though it was late none of them were ready to end the night, especially since they both knew they would have a busy week ahead, so they decided to watch a movie in Chanyeol's room.

Chanyeol leaned back against the headboard, sitting with the laptop at his feet, while Kyungsoo lay on his stomach near the laptop so he could see the subtitles better.

They were watching a horror movie when the giant started to ramble.

"I mean… look at this.” Chanyeol loved to ramble during the movie, even though he knew it annoyed Kyungsoo "who can explain a hospital with only one doctor and three nurses working during the night shift and most of the lights are out? It doesn't make sense,” he continued complaining.

Kyungsoo just rolled his eyes pushing his foot into his friend's face so he would shut his mouth but Chanyeol continued rambling minutes later.

"Naaah man, now she's walking in the house with the lights off. This is so predictable ... she's going to die."

Kyungsoo paused the movie rising from his position to sit toward Chanyeol.

"Are we watching this or what?" he asked, annoyed, but not really. Kyungsoo was used to the rambling of his friend and in most parts his comments were always right.

"We are." Chanyeol shoving away Kyungsoo’s foot who insisted on rocking it in front of his face "but you need to get your stinking feet out of my face."

"My feet do not stink, you giraffe." He shook them once more in Chanyeol's face. "Look, they smell like baby feet."

Chanyeol seized the opportunity and grabbed his friend's feet to tickle the other by surprise. "You asked for it," he said.

Kyungsoo couldn't help lying down laughing, his belly ached with laughter, he tried to untie, but Chanyeol held his feet with his arms, tickling the other.

"Stop! Stop you giraffe!" He shouted laughing. He kept trying to loosen his foot and he managed to do it, but without realizing that he ended up hitting Chanyeol's face with his foot. The other immediately covered his face whining. Kyungsoo got up scared approaching Chanyeol.

"Chanyeollie, I'm sorry" he said worried "oh my God, I'm sorry ... I didn't mean to hit you" he tried to see the damage, but the other didn't take his hand off his face. "I'll get you some ice."

Before he could get up, Chanyeol grabbed his wrist and started laughing, showing his face, with no bruises. It took 1 minute for Kyungsoo to realize the joke; he was shocked and honestly a bit scared thinking he really had hit his friend.

"You stupid ass," he said finally, pushing his friend who continued to laugh.

It was funny it almost seemed like Kyungsoo was whining, he never did that.

"Sorry" Chanyeol replied trying to stop laughing, he noticed Kyungsoo’s frightened eyes and realized that he had crossed the limits. "Sorry, Soo. I didn't mean to scare you like that. It was a joke"

Kyungsoo didn't even realize he had raised his hand to touch where he thought he had hit him. His touch was so gentle that almost made Chanyeol stop breathing. There was something in his eyes, something beyond worry. It was almost as if they were having a moment just like they did a year ago, and then it was as if reality had hit them and Kyungsoo withdrew his hand from Chanyeol's face without looking directly at him.

"Hm ... I'm going to sleep" was all he said when he got up.

"Wait ... what about the movie?" Chanyeol asked, a little off guard.

"We can watch it later"

Chanyeol nodded, scratching the back of his head, he was feeling unsure for some reason. Kyungsoo paused holding the door handle.

"What?" Chanyeol asked.

"I just ..." Kyungsoo looked at the floor like he was trying to find whatever he wanted to say in there, and then he looked back at Chanyeol. "I missed you. I'm glad we had such a great time tonight."

Chanyeol felt so relieved hearing he saying that, he was worried he would mess up. That his jealousy would ruin the night somehow.

"Me too" Chanyeol replied with a little smile. He waved his friend goodbye and went back to bed, feeling content.

 

^_^

 

The night was cold, the wind making noises and spreading the leaves of the trees in the street, Chanyeol hugged himself tightening the coat around him, he had just left the studio and was heading home but he notice that the lights where Kyungsoo rehearsed was on so he thought about taking a quick visit to kill time with his friend. They've been hanging out more lately. Even though Kyungsoo spend most of his time with Jongin training, somehow Chanyeol and Kyungsoo still find time for each other. They were back to their usual self and Chanyeol was pretty happy about it. Chanyeol bought some beers at the convenience store under the dance studio and went up to check on him.

Kyungsoo was dancing with his back to the entrance, staring at the mirror that covered the entire wall in front of him. He was too focused to notice Chanyeol leaning in the doorway looking at him. Chanyeol noticed that he was wearing his usual black Nike pants and black shirt, the difference being the tap shoes. He was sweaty and yet the taller found him attractive, it something about Kyungsoo's eyes when they were serious that made the inner side of Chanyeol twist. He coughed, putting his thoughts away. Kyungsoo looked at him, a little startled.

“Oh hey… I didn't see you there.”

Chanyeol then entered the room showing his bag with beers.

“I thought I'd stop by and make you some company.”

The young man smiled, turning his attention to the mirror as Chanyeol walked to a corner of the room and sat down on the floor, opening a beer, while his friend continued to practice. Kyungsoo was very diligent; he repeated a movement again and again until he did it perfectly. At some point Chanyeol started to pick up the movements in his head. Tap with his heels, then toe, heel, toe, spank step, heel, heel, toe. But then he got lost, he couldn't even imagine how the younger could remember all those moves. Kyungsoo spent a long time rehearsing and then he came to sit by his side, Chanyeol offered him a beer.

“Thanks”, he said, taking a sip.

“How long have you been here?” Chanyeol asked, looking at him.

“Hmmm...” he bit his lips thinking, Chanyeol couldn't help but look at it, they looked red and wet from the beer. He looked away before taking another sip of his own beer. “I guess 3 or 4 hours.” Kyungsoo said at last.

Chanyeol thought about asking Jongin whereabouts, shouldn't he be training with Kyungsoo? But he didn't want to know where he was, not really, he just wanted to take advantage of this moment with Kyungsoo, just them.

“You've been working so hard, Soo. I'm sure it will pay off.”

Kyungsoo looked at him, the side of his mouth lifting up a little; he could always count on the support of the giant.

“I hope so. I'm kind of nervous though.” He confessed.

Chanyeol frowned.

“Because...?” He encouraged him to continue.

“I don't know...” he shrugged. “Tap dancing is new to me, but I really like it.” He took another sip. “I think I’m afraid of making mistakes in front of people.”

Chanyeol thought about it, he had seen Kyungsoo nervous plenty of times, but that was always behind the scenes. In front of people he looked so calm and confident it was almost hard to believe he had stage fright. Yet a memory brought a smile to his lips.

“Just imagine the audience naked when you go up there and you've got this.” Chanyeol smirked.

“What?” Kyungsoo laughed “Are you going to walk around naked again?”

Chanyeol nodded, closing his eyes and smiling sheepishly.

“If you need me to.”

Kyungsoo shook his head, not believing in him. The memory was still fresh in Chanyeol’s mind, from when Kyungsoo was performing in his first play in college and he forgot one of the lines in the middle of the play, everyone was staring at him waiting for him to continue and suddenly someone entered the room wearing only his boxers, covering his parts with his hands and their face hidden beneath a fox's head, running from one corner to the corner. Making everyone in the room laugh, including Kyungsoo. He knew why the person inside the mask used that one specific mask. Besides paying a bet, it was also Chanyeol’s favorite cartoon movie, and in that movie stood out a something for both of them. How Judy’s didn’t lose hope when her boss assigned to her job, she waited for the right opportunity to take a leap of faith. _“Sometimes, in order to achieve something amazing in life, you have to be daring. You have to take the leap of faith.”_ He remembers Chanyeol saying exactly this to him.

Kyungsoo was grateful for his friend to remind him of that. He took a deep breath to calm down, remembering his next line and continued.

Kyungsoo sighed, resting his head on Chanyeol's shoulder. He almost stopped breathing, the smallest wasn't very fond of being clingy and touchy, and it’s why every time he did something like that he always caught the tall one off guard.

“I can't believe you did that.”

He sounded nostalgic. Chanyeol looked sideways, noticing Kyungsoo's long dark lashes, the tip of his nose, his upper lip. Chanyeol swallowed, resting his hand Kyungsoo's on his thigh.

“I actually needed to show off my newly acquired abs.” He joked, hoping Kyungsoo couldn't listen to his heartbeat going up. “I got lots of new contacts after that.”

Kyungsoo lifted his head from his shoulder and rolled his eyes, giving a light punch to his friend's shoulder, as he always did when he was being a show off.

“Show off…” Kyungsoo murmured.

They looked at each other smiling. Chanyeol could feel the affection, the companionship, the amity shared between through those looks and it always made his chest warm.  Kyungsoo looked at him like he was trying to read him, he took a sip of his beer not willing to let the smaller get through him with his eyes.

“Speaking of showing off...” he averted his gaze. “When are you going to show me those moves you were doing when I got here?”

“I thought you were a great dancer.” Kyungsoo joked, “Why would you need to learn them?

_Because I like you and I want to learn about everything that makes you happy_ , he thought. But quickly threw that thought away. “ _It’s just a crush, Chanyeol. Don’t be stupid, he said to himself.”_

“The chicks seem to dig it.” He said out loud.

Yeah, he was stupid.

Kyungsoo shook his head with his lips in a tight line; he got up and offered his hand to him.

“C'mon, I'll show you.”

Kyungsoo helped him get up and they stood in front of the mirror looking at the reflection in front of them. They stood beside each other, Kyungsoo looked at Chanyeol's reflection to talk to him and Chanyeol did the same to learn the moves.

“So first you need to spread your legs, open them in the same length of your shoulders.” He started doing the movements and encouraging Chanyeol to do it.  “Now you tap with your right heel, then the left heel, then you tap with right toe and then your left toe.”

He did it slowly and then fast. Chanyeol tried to do it, but he was just clumsy and with his height he looked like an adorable mess. Kyungsoo laughed.

“Don't laugh.” Chanyeol said embarrassed.

Kyungsoo bit his upper lip trying not to laugh.

“Ok sorry... look at me.” They turned to stand in front of each other. Chanyeol was incredibly tall and when they were close like this, Kyungsoo always had to tilt his head and look up.

“Repeat with me...” he said, looking at the taller “right heel, left heel, right toe, and left toe.”

Chanyeol did it, a little off beat, but he managed to do it; bringing a smile to Kyungsoo's lips. His heart flipped in his chest, this is exactly why he was willing to learn the things Kyungsoo was passionate about, his eyes glowed so much, he looked so satisfied, and Chanyeol could almost see an aura vibrating around him.

“Yes.” Kyungsoo said fondly. “Now do this... right heel, left heel, right heel, left toe.” He repeated the move slowly and then fast to show the beat of the dance.

Chanyeol tried to, but he ended missing the steps and just tapping his feet randomly like he was dancing samba. Kyungsoo held up as much as he could but he burst into laughter making the giant flustered.

“Don't laugh.” He whined, his ears turning red.

Kyungsoo couldn't stop, he closed his eyes turning them into crescent and opened his mouth in that heart shaped smile. Chanyeol held his wrists, still whining.

“Soo, don't laugh!”

“I'm sorry.” Kyungsoo continued, trying to control his laughter and his breathing. “You just look so adorable doing that move” He blurted out.

Kyungsoo continued laughing and that made Chanyeol chest even warmer than before.  The way he closed his eyes, his eyes were forming a line of crescent moon, his lips forming that familiar heart shaped smile, his cheeks popping out. Kyungsoo was so beautiful. Chanyeol would never stop gawking over him. He was never to feel things over someone calling him cute, his mom always does it, every once in a while his friends do it too. But now with his chest pounding even harder than before he wondered if Kyungsoo held that much power of him. And that's when he gave up. That's when he accepted that this wasn't just a crush. That no matter how much he tried his feelings for Kyungsoo wasn't going to change just because he was scared. He was in love with him; he was in love with his best friend.

Chanyeol was still holding to the other's wrist watching him laugh. His heart was spazzing out. He felt the moment changing, he saw the moment changing, just like he could see Kyungsoo noticing it too, gradually stopping laughing and looking at the taller with big apprehensive eyes, his ears turning slightly red.

Chanyeol didn't even think about the consequences anymore, he was tired of thinking about it, he was tired of thinking what the future could be and how he could very much be destroying it right now. So he gave up the fight with his own self. With his hand on the other's wrist, he scooted closer to Kyungsoo. And just like that he closed the gap between their mouths, like the air he was holding and the air he needed to breathe, the relief was right there in Kyungsoo's lips.

And relief was there even more when Kyungsoo opened his mouth, giving him entrance. Chanyeol pulled him close, the overwhelming need to feel his body against the other. Hearing the younger moan against his mouth. This is it. Chanyeol was dreaming, he was sure of it.

Chanyeol traced Kyungsoo's jaw with his fingers, slipping his hand behind his neck, his palm fitting perfectly against the back of his head. He traced his mouth with his tongue, exploring and sucking the other's lips. He could feel Kyungsoo tightening his hold on Chanyeol's waist, bringing him closer and he could see Kyungsoo's knees going week.

Chanyeol pushed him against the nearest wall, without stopping the kiss. He didn't allow himself to think about the invisible lines of friendship that had just been broken. Sliding his hand on Kyungsoo's thigh and pulling it up against his waist. He rubbed his crotch against the other and Kyungsoo moaned once again giving him chance to explore his neck. Chanyeol kissed and sucked his neck going up to his earlobe and he was about to slid his hands on the other's thigh once again to pull him up with his legs around Chanyeol waist, but slowly he could feel Kyungsoo freezing up with his hands on Chanyeol's chest, running out of breath.

"Chan... Chanyeol..."' Kyungsoo started in a whisper "Yeol, what are we doing?" his chest going up and down, breathing loudly. _He stopped the kiss_ , _he doesn’t like me_. Chanyeol immediately thought.

And that's when realization started to hit Chanyeol, the way Kyungsoo froze, his voice sounding disturbed, that's when he knew he fucked up, he ruined the one thing, the most important thing in his life, his friendship with Kyungsoo.

He stood there in silence, with his face hidden in the crook of the other's shoulders, trying to calm his own breath. God... he couldn't even face him. He didn't even know what to say.

They stayed there for what it felt like minutes, until Chanyeol slid his hands down Kyungsoo's arms and got away from him. He didn't even look him in the eyes, he simply murmured "I'm sorry" turning his back to him and going away leaving Kyungsoo frozen against the wall.

 

^_^

 

The next few days were the worst Chanyeol could remember. He didn't see Kyungsoo at all for days. He was avoiding him like the plague; he was practically living in the studio. And every time he went home, the other was out practicing.

Of course Baekhyun and Jongdae noticed the change.

"Omg! Can you guys talk for the love of God?" Baekhyun shouted frustrated one day, when Chanyeol went home to get some clothes. "This is getting out of hand. I've never seen you guys fight like this."

Chanyeol too, he didn't remember spending so much time away from the other. But he didn't know how to face him. Ironically, he thought, it didn't even need for them to date to change the dynamic of their group since they weren't hanging out anymore.

One day he was heading out of the building of his studio when he saw Kyungsoo getting out of the practice, with Jongin by his side. Chanyeol hid behind a light pole, watching them getting out of the dance studio laughing. They stopped in front of it and Jongin hugged him tightly for what it seemed like minutes in Chanyeol's point of view, he gave Kyungsoo a kiss on his check and then he waved the smaller goodbye and headed to the other side. Kyungsoo's smiled fondly waving it back. Then he glanced back at the direction of Chanyeol's studio. Chanyeol pulled his hood to hide his face, praying the other wouldn't notice him behind thepole. After a few seconds he glanced at the other side of the street and Kyungsoo wasn't there anymore.

A few more days passed by like this, Chanyeol went home thinking no one would be there at that hour until he found himself facing a small figure looking at him with fear in his eyes.

"Hey" Kyungsoo greeted, unsure.

Chanyeol glanced at him for a second, before looking away to the floor and replying

"Hi".

Kyungsoo stood up from the couch.

"How have you been?"

"Good" he lied, he was miserable. But Chanyeol was stupid, he always tried to hide how he felt no matter how much it hurt him.

"'Can we talk?" Kyungsoo asked. His tone of voice serious.

"Sure." Chanyeol shrugged like it wasn't a big deal, like he wasn't the one needing to apologize to the other. He sat at the couch and pointed at his side for Kyungsoo to sit again. The silence was killing him slowly, he was coming up with all the ways, all the words he could apologize to him, but it was like his mouth was frozen unable to move.

"The other day when we..." Kyungsoo started, but Chanyeol panicked feeling the need to interrupt him. His mouth finally able to move.

"How's practice?" Chanyeol abruptly asked.

Kyungsoo got taken aback by the sudden question, he looked confused at Chanyeol.

"Good."

Chanyeol nodded, remembering something.

"And Jongin?" the image of the intimate hug and kiss they shared in front of the studio coming into his mind. He knew it was nothing, he knew and he still asked.

"What about him?" Kyungsoo asked confused.

"I saw you two hugging the other day. I didn't realize you guys became so close." God someone please cover his mouth with tape, put him to sleep or something... anything for him to not say another stupid thing. Chanyeol begged to the sky.

"Is that what you're worried about right now?" Kyungsoo asked slightly annoyed. Chanyeol didn't answer. "Don't you have anything to say to me, Yeol?" The slight hurt in his voice, the way he said his nickname. It felt like Chanyeol's heart was coming out of his mouth and got stuck on his throat, he gulped.

Chanyeol knew what he had to do; he knew the safest option in order for him to not lose his friend. He massaged his temples, sighing.

"I'm sorry" he finally replied. Kyungsoo waited, his eyes telling him this was exactly what he needed. "I shouldn't have kissed you. It was wrong of me to push myself to you like that. I don't know what's gotten into me."

Kyungsoo looked at Chanyeol like he was waiting for more, Chanyeol didn't knew why but he could almost see hurt in his eyes.

"Is that all?" His voice trembled.

"What do you want me to say?" Chanyeol looked at him confused. Not really following what the younger wanted, he had apologized after all.

Kyungsoo looked at him for a minute, trying to read him. Chanyeol looked back bewildered. The younger sighed, standing up and heading towards the door. He stopped midway holding the door handle. He glanced back at Chanyeol, and the older could see tears forming on Kyungsoo's eyes.

"You're a damn coward, you know that right Chanyeol?" Kyungsoo whispered before leaving and closing the door with a loud knock.

Chanyeol looked at the door. He couldn't understand what just happened, he apologized. What more he needed to do?

 

^_^

 

“Hey ... you're not going?” Baekhyun asked looking at Chanyeol. It's the opening day of Kyungsoo's play and he was sitting on the couch mopping about how much he missed him. Chanyeol got out of his thoughts looking at Baekhyun; he was all dressed up ready to leave. Chanyeol didn't answer. He didn't know if he had the guts to look at Kyungsoo. He was right after all, Chanyeol was a damn coward.

Baekhyun sighed as he opened the door to leave. He paused hesitantly and looked back at Chanyeol. “I thought best friends supported each other on everything.” Baekhyun added, his tone of voice low, he left without waiting for Chanyeol’s reply.

Chanyeol stared at the door, feeling his chest tighten and sadness reaching him again. He sat there for minutes, pondering what he should do while what Baekhyun said stuck to his mind. He was right, there was not a moment where Kyungsoo and Chanyeol weren't there for each other, even when they disagreed and fought over something, they always stood in the middle ready to compromise and leave the misunderstandings behind. Even if what happened was more than a misunderstanding, more than all the other disagreements they had, Chanyeol understood no matter what he had to be there for him, on his big break. He stood up taking his wallet and the keys for his scooter, with a new found determination.

He stood behind the audience during the whole play, watching from a corner with a bouquet of flowers in his hands. Sometimes Kyungsoo would look at the audience as if he was looking for something or someone and then he was immersed in his character again. He was wonderful; Chanyeol could feel the emotion coming from the character as he tapped his feet on the ground forming a sound with rhythm only with his feet, dancing through the whole stage. He was so powerful, Chanyeol thought. Kyungsoo was shining with confidence. By the time the play was over the whole audience stood up clapping and the whole cast bowed thanking people. Kyungsoo navigated with his eyes through the audience until he saw the giant in the corner, in the back, and it was like nothing bad ever happened. Kyungsoo immediately smiled as Chanyeol waved at him.

Chanyeol waited while Kyungsoo was greeted by people, he looked so happy, he couldn't help but feel a little happy too just by looking at his friend. Happiness that didn't last long, when Chanyeol noticed Jongin giving a tight hug and perhaps a little too intimate in Kyungsoo, while the later smiled tenderly at him. Then Kyungsoo stepped out of the embrace, saying something to Jongin and coming towards Chanyeol. Chanyeol smiled, not really reaching his eyes.

“You were wonderful there.”  He said as the other approached.

Kyungsoo stopped in front of him, seeming in doubt as how to greet him. _This is awkward_ , Chanyeol thought. He handed the flowers over to the younger, not knowing what to say.

“Thank you, Yeol.” He looked at the bouquet and pressed it to his nose, feeling the fragrance reach his nose. “For a moment I thought you wouldn't come.” His voice was low, as if he were whispering. He looked sad when he said that.

“Yeah...about that.” Chanyeol fidgeted on his feet “I'm sorry, Soo. I was an idiot. I don’t want us to be like this. The last thing I want is to ruin our friendship.”

Chanyeol said more words to Kyungsoo at this moment than he had said all week. He was serious about it. Even though he realized his feelings rather late, he knew that this was best for both of them. Especially when he knew Kyungsoo didn't feel the same way about him. He wasn't going to compromise their friendship only because he recently realized his feelings.

“Look, Yeol... I” Kyungsoo started saying, but he was interrupted. Jongin and Baekhyun were shouting his name, catching their attention. Kyungsoo sighed.

“It's alright” Chanyeol smiled sadly. “Go with them.  I just wanted to tell you this and that I'm happy for you.”

Kyungsoo bit his lip, looking from the two boys to Chanyeol. Chanyeol put his hands on the smallest shoulder pushing him to go.

“Ok ok” Kyungsoo said “Catch you later at home?”

Chanyeol nodded saying goodbye and heading towards the parking lot. He was heading to his scooter when he noticed someone calling his name. He turned toward the sound and saw Kyungsoo opening the door and running towards him. Chanyeol was confused, did he forget something? He touched his pockets checking to see if he had his belongings. Kyungsoo raced until he reached Chanyeol, stopping right in front of him.

“What happened?” Chanyeol asked.

Kyungsoo raised his right hand signaling him to wait. He bent down, putting his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath.

“I'm tired.”

_OK_? Chanyeol thought. He was confused. He didn't know if Kyungsoo was referring to his run over to him or something else. He waited for the other to continue.

Kyungsoo finally stood up looking at Chanyeol directly in the eyes.

“Do you like me?” Kyungsoo simply asked, like the question didn’t just made Chanyeol’s freeze. “Please Yeol, be honest with me.” He begged.

Chanyeol was dumbfounded. Did Kyungsoo figure it out? What should he say? Should he deny it?

“I don't want to ruin our friendship either.” Kyungsoo continued, still breathing heavily. That was it; he was going to reject him and he didn’t even confessed his feelings. Chanyeol thought. “But I'm tired, Yeol.”

Chanyeol looked very stunned, still not understanding Kyungsoo's line of thought.

“I'm not following, Soo.” He voiced his thoughts.

“I mean, I like you, stupid.” He said in a loud voice, getting Chanyeol out of his daze. “I've been in love with you for a while now.”

Chanyeol couldn't believe it, he couldn't believe what he just heard. He was joking, right? He was sure that Kyungsoo did not like him that way, he never showed any signs, and he was the one who stopped their kiss.

“Say something.” Kyungsoo asked after some time, with hope in his eyes.

“When... why now... I mean... u never showed” He stuttered between words.

“I love that we're friends, Yeol. I never wanted to jeopardize that.” Kyungsoo continued, not looking into Chanyeol's eyes. “But then, you kissed me and I thought ... maybe he likes me.”

Kyungsoo looked at him again “Unless you don't ... I mean if I assumed wrong I...”

Chanyeol interrupted him, putting one of his hands on the back of his neck and pulling him into a kiss. Kyungsoo was taken aback, it took him a second to understand and then he relented, resting his hands on Chanyeol's chest and closing his eyes. This kiss was slow, not hungry like the other in the studio, but more like the two wanted to take slow and enjoy every part of this moment. Chanyeol explored Kyungsoo's mouth with his tongue making the other moan, he let out a breath, almost a sigh. The giant rested his forehead on the smallest forehead and smiled with his lips next to his.

“I do...” he sighed “I do like you, Soo.”

Kyungsoo smiled, closing the space and giving him a tender kiss.

“Wait...” he distanced himself a little. “What about Jongin?”

Now it was Kyungsoo who looked confused.

“What?”

“I thought you two had something.” Chanyeol scratched the back of his neck.

“What?” Kyungsoo widened his eyes. “No way, why would you think that?”

“I don't know...” Chanyeol sighed. “He's overly touchy with you.”

That made Kyungsoo laugh, he put his hands on Chanyeol's waist.

“He's like this with everyone, Yeol. He's just a friend.” He said seriously, looking up as Chanyeol looked down at him. The latter closed the space between them, enveloping him in a hug and resting his chin on the top of the Kyungsoo's head. Kyungsoo leaned his head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat, he smiled.

“I can't believe we like each other and didn't have the guts to tell the truth.”

Chanyeol moved his chin away from his forehead, staring at him, still tightening his embrace.

“I know...” Chanyeol laughed feeling quite dumb for pining over the other for so long.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Kyungsoo asked him curious.

And Chanyeol got reminded of why he pined for him for so long. He loosened their embrace just resting his hands on the other's waist.

"Too many "what ifs" in my mind." Chanyeol confessed and Kyungsoo understood, even though Chanyeol didn't say many words he knew what he meant. Their future, their friends, their feelings... would it last?

Kyungsoo lifted his palms holding Chanyeol's face. He looked at Chanyeol with sincerity in his eyes, it was like he was trying to convey everything he felt.

"Can we stop worrying about what ifs and live in the now?" He asked fondly.

They looked at each other, smiling affectionately.  Chanyeol wondered if this was a dream and if it was he didn't want to wake up. With his right hand he caressed Kyungsoo's face, leaning down and kissing his forehead, his nose, his upper lip.

“C'mon” Kyungsoo grabbed his hand “Let's go home.”

They started walking toward Chanyeol's scooter.

“Oh, I forgot to tell you, a director watched the play and he offered me a role in a historical drama.”

“What? That's great, Soo.” He smiled at him, he couldn't stop smiling.

“I mean I still have to go through the audition but I pass I’ll have to learn archery” then he added like he forgot “oh and riding a horse”.

“I will help you.” Chanyeol said, holding up both of their hands bringing Kyungsoo's hand to him, kissing it gently.

“That's what best friends do right?” Kyungsoo asked teasingly.

Chanyeol let go of his hand, Kyungsoo pushing closer to him and putting a hand on his shoulder.

“No, Soo. That's what best friends forward slash boyfriends do.”

**Author's Note:**

> I really wanted to put this out because the images in my mind were driving me insane even tho I'm not completely satisfied with it. Thank you for reading this. It's my first fic so I'm sure there's lots of plots holes but please if you have something to say be nice with it. I'll take the cristicism with me.


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